Monday, September 15, 2014

A Transvestite Did My Makeup

 (I am away for my wedding and Honeymoon so I am re-posting some of my favorites)

So, C and I have this neighbor.  We were almost positive that he/she is a transvestite, but weren’t quite sure. Well, I’ve confirmed it. 

Last Friday night we were standing outside talking after coming back from a friend’s birthday party at a bar.  We had definitely had a few drinks so our judgment may have been slightly impaired. While we were out there our neighbor and a few of his/her friends were coming back from who knows where.  They were all done up in super high heels and tight dresses.

As they walked/stumbled by they invited us in for a drink.  For some unknown reason, we were like sure why not? First mistake. I thought it would be fun and adventurous, because I don’t usually do stuff like that. We went in and did a shot while chatting with her (I am just going to start calling this person a girl….that’s what she wants right?) and she mentioned she was afraid of me because I am so professional and she always hears my heels in the morning as I am leaving for work.  She’s intimidated by me?!?  The whole time she kept having nip slips. Her dress kept sliding down. You guys, it’s still awkward to see that from a woman that you know is actually a man.

So as we are standing around the kitchen she invites us out with her.  For some reason, we were like what the heck. Second mistake. All the sudden the house is in a tizzy and she shouts, “Ooo let me do your makeup!” You guys, I let her. I mean, how could I say no? This chick was bigger than me and quite scary. Third mistake.  She runs to the bathroom yelling “transvestite makeup party!” So yeah, that confirmed it for me.

She takes me into the bathroom, which is full of great makeup and makes me wash my face and sit down on the laundry basket. Then she proceeds to put my bangs up all weird and put a rhinestone headband on my head like a tiara. Then she shuts the door. Um?  Please don’t kill me.  She starts doing a full face of makeup.  She tells me that even though I had makeup on it wasn’t good enough and I’m not that pretty but she can make me pretty. Ouch.

She takes a break from doing my makeup to pee.  She sits down on the toilet while I am still there (and facing that side of the room).  Where the heck am I supposed to look?

By this time it’s probably about 1:15am and her friends are getting antsy and want to go out. She tells them to shut up.  Then she tells them to just go home if they aren’t happy.  She scares me. I keep trying to open the door to talk to C and she keeps shutting it.

She decides I will obviously need clothes, so she opens the door and tells C to go get me something to wear.  I’m silently praying the entire time he is gone.  When he comes back with an outfit she tells him it’s terrible and not good enough.  I felt so bad, because I thought he did a great job. It’s exactly something I would have picked and he knows it.  I just don’t have the kinds of clothes she was looking for.  So C sets down the heels he grabbed (fourth mistake) and goes back for a second try.  I try and direct him to something she might think is appropriate.

While he is gone, she asks if she can “wing me out” with the eyeliner.  I mean, I am not gonna say no to this chick.   Fifth mistake.  She started doing the eyeliner and I’m still silently praying. Why in the world did think it would be fun to let this slightly intoxicated man dressed as a woman near my eyeball with a pencil?!? I can feel her drawing the lines on my face and it feels pretty ridiculous.

Soon C comes back with a new dress, also not acceptable. She thinks she may have something for me to wear.  Now I have to go to the bathroom.  I try to get her to leave.  She won’t.  Um? I take off the headband, run out the door and grab the house keys from C and run to our house. C quickly follows.  He tells her it’s getting late and we will have to go out some other time.  The whole time she is screaming about how she wasted her makeup on me and who knows what else.

When C gets home I ask him where my heels were. Obviously, they were still on her bathroom floor where he left them.  So we have to sneak back into her house to try and get them.  Thankfully she was distracted and we were so quick that we got away easily.

I get home and finally take a look in the mirror.  She has completely destroyed my face. I wish I would have taken more pictures, but I wasn’t thinking at the time.  The wings of the eyeliner extended about a half inch on one side and a full inch on the other side!  My hair pretty much looked like a quail. Good stuff.

The only evidence....
I have to say, even though it was scary it was quite hilarious. We laugh for quite a while when we got home and I know we will laugh about this for years to come!
Also, I am deathly afraid to see her again. C and I were walking to our door the other day and saw her going the other way. We completely stopped in our tracks and shut our mouths hoping she wouldn’t see us.  Thankfully, we were successful.  I just know I am going to run into him/her again soon though, he/she’s our next door neighbor!

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Friday, September 12, 2014

Lip Factory Review - August

It’s time for a Lip Factory review!

Lip Factory is a monthly beauty box that is $22 a month (S&H included) and comes with 5-7 products each time.  The box aims to give you a “full face” of makeup, but its main focus is on…lips of course!  This is one of my favorites, and though more expensive than ipsy, they always send full sized products which is great!

Sometimes this box has a theme and sometimes it doesn’t. I guess this month is a “doesn’t.”

So here it is….the August Lip Factory box!  

           1)     LASplash Mineral Blush in “Beach Party” – 2.5 g. each (FULL SIZE)
I think this blush would be beautiful….if it actually had color.   I mean, this stuff would barely show up on a ghosts face, let alone mine! It’s got a beautiful shimmer to it though, so maybe I can use it on top of something I already own.
Full Size: $15.00 each My Value: $15.00

           2)    LASplash Lip Lacquer in “Underground” – .2 oz. (FULL SIZE)
This reminds me of a nail polish that I got a few months ago….which I felt was better suited for a ten year old.  Orangy pink with chunks of glitter? I think I will be gifting this to my junior bridesmaid!
Full Size: $9.00 My Value: $9.00

           3)    Medusa’s Makeup Stick It Eye Primer - .02 oz (FULL SIZE)
There are a lot of eye shadow primers out there and I have a hard time thinking that this would be one of the better ones.  I will give it a try, but shadow primer is one makeup item I definitely have a favorite of and I’m not sure anything can sway that.  (BTW if you are wondering, it’s the MAC paint pot in Barestudy!)
Full Size: $8.00 My Value: $8.00

          4)    Cult Nails Lacquer in “Nakizzles Shizzle” – .05 oz. (FULL SIZE)
           There is not a single thing I like about this.  I barely use nail polish and if I did it 
           definitely wouldn’t be this color.  I really hate the name of the polish too.  They really 
           must have run out of ideas!
          Full Size: $12.00 My Value: $12.00

           5)    Pink Powder Parlor Lipstick #720 – ?? oz. (FULL SIZE)
            I know this sounds weird, but I am not sure I really trust this lipstick!  There is not a 
            single piece of identifying information on the tube except for the numbers 720.   
            There is no brand, no color name, no product weight.  Nothing.  It’s not my color 
            either so I won’t be using it!
           Full Size: $10.00 My Value: $10.00

6)  Red Cherry False Lashes #16 Black – (FULL SIZE)
These aren’t too bad actually.  I tend to stick to more natural looking lashes, so these are right up my alley.  Once I stop filling my lash extensions, I will be putting these to good use!
Full Size: $2.50 My Value: $2.50

Final Cost: $22.00
Final Value: $56.50

I’m not totally impressed with this months haul.  The products all seemed “cheap” to me.  I think the only things I will get use out of are the blush and the lashes.  The rest just aren’t my style.  Bummer.

What do you think?

If you’d like to sign up…..use my referral number? Pretty please?  It’s 385223.

(Also, I swear I’m not a review blog….I just like sharing these fun things! I have not been compensated for this review.)
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Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Cautiously Optimistic

(I am away for my wedding and Honeymoon so I am reposting some of my favorites)

(This was written the day after I met my now husband)

So....I met a boy.  Well, I've met lots of boys I suppose, but this one is special. He is very attractive, tall (6'4),  and a total gentleman. 

I've been helping out my friend A that plays for the Rattler's (the one I went to Vegas with) and given him a few rides around town. The other day, he brought along a teammate, C.  We totally hit it off. 

We've chatted during the day every day since I met him, which is  really only 4 days ago.  I've hung out with him twice and we are going out again tonight. He asks me how my day was. He texts me goodnight. He texts me good morning. He even called to say goodnight last night.  It's been years since I've had a man do that. I love it :)

I wish I had better radar because what I can't tell is if he actually likes me or if he is just bored and loney in Arizona and needs a friend.  He is from Tampa but the team is currently living in a hotel for training camp.  He also doesn't have a car yet, which means he can't go anywhere unless someone takes him.

So......I'm being cautious.....but optimistic.

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Monday, September 8, 2014

I'm Married!!!

It's finally official....I am Mrs. Justine Dukes!

Now we are headed to the beautiful island of Maui to spend 11 days relaxing on the beaches.

Since I want to spend quality time with my new hubby, I will mostly be re-posting some of my favorite posts for the next few weeks....enjoy!
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Friday, September 5, 2014

Starbox Review - August

Starbox time! 
Just in case you don’t know, Starbox is a monthly beauty box that is $15 a month (plus a few dollars S&H) and comes with 3-4 FULL SIZED products each time.  No tiny lotion samples!
The website says the makeup line is comparable to MAC, Chanel, Sephora and other department store lines.  It also says that the value of each monthly box ranges from $35.00 to $99.00.

I am on the fence about continuing this box, but I am waiting to see what their next loyalty reward is.  Every three months as a subscriber you get a $35 coupon code to shop in their store.  I’ve heard rumor this is going away.

The theme of this box is “Doll House.”

Here it is….the August Starbox!  

           1)     Starlooks Liquid Eye Liner in “Black” -  .14 oz  (FULL SIZE)
I am really really excited about this! I got lash extensions a few weeks ago and I have had to start using pencil liner because the gel and brush is just too difficult right now.  As I’m not a big pencil liner, I didn’t have many nice ones laying around.  This will be perfect!
Full Size: $16.00 My Value: $16.00

          2)    Starlooks Blush compact #3B2 - .26 oz. (FULL SIZE)
           Oooo these are really pretty.  I love that it has various shades. The picture didn’t turn 
           out too well, these are all much darker than they look.  The darkest one is almost too 
           dark, but the other two are really beautiful.  I will definitely be using this!
          Full Size: $46.00 My Value: $45.00

Final Cost: $17.58
Final Value: $62.00

I am a little bummed that this box doesn’t have at least one more product in it, but I am really happy with the products I got!  I wish they would have added a gloss or lip stick to complete the look.   Plus, only two items (though high priced) is a bit of a let down! Doesn't that picture and item list just look so lacking?!?

What do you think?

If you’d like to try Starbox you can sign up here!

(Also, I swear I’m not a review blog….I just like sharing these fun things! I have not been compensated for this review.)

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Wednesday, September 3, 2014

Bon's Book Club - Brain On Fire

It's Book Club time again!

This month’s book for Bon’s Book Club was Brain On Fire: My Month ofMadness by Susannah Calahan.  I was kind of not looking forward to reading this book and almost decided not to purchase it.  You guys, I am SOOO glad I did!  The book is a completely true story, which I really liked. Here is the description of the book from Amazon:

“An award-winning memoir and instant New York Times bestseller that goes far beyond its riveting medical mystery, Brain on Fire is the powerful account of one woman’s struggle to recapture her identity.

When twenty-four-year-old Susannah Cahalan woke up alone in a hospital room, strapped to her bed and unable to move or speak, she had no memory of how she’d gotten there. Days earlier, she had been on the threshold of a new, adult life: at the beginning of her first serious relationship and a promising career at a major New York newspaper. Now she was labeled violent, psychotic, a flight risk. What happened?

In a swift and breathtaking narrative, Susannah tells the astonishing true story of her descent into madness, her family’s inspiring faith in her, and the lifesaving diagnosis that nearly didn’t happen. “A fascinating look at the disease that…could have cost this vibrant, vital young woman her life” (People), Brain on Fire is an unforgettable exploration of memory and identity, faith and love, and a profoundly compelling tale of survival and perseverance that is destined to become a classic.”

This book was so incredibly interesting.  I was totally able to put myself in the authors shoes and understand how she was feeling, which I really loved.  Before this happened to her, she was a writer for the New York Post, so that should really tell you about her writing skills. It’s amazing to read such a good book by a woman who at one point could barely speak, would hallucinate things and even drool on herself.  

Some people might not like all of the medical details she writes about (they help explain her diagnosis and the reason for her symptoms) but I found them absolutely fascinating. I learned so much about the body and the brain through this book and it never once felt like I was being forced to, like I would in school.  I read it a lot while flying to Cleveland and I know there was several times where I exclaimed out loud “Wow” or “That’s cool” or “I never knew that.” 

Seriously, this was a fascinating book and I would definitely recommend it to anyone!  It was a quick read and had really short chapters, which are pretty much my favorite!

Next up for Bon’s Book Club is Eleanor and Park by Rainbow Rowell.  My co-worker suggested this book to me a few months ago, so I am excited to finally read it.  

Have you read Brain on Fire? What are your thoughts?
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Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Pretty Little Beauty Swap Sign Up!

Happy Late  Labor Day! I hope you had a great holiday weekend! I am so excited to announce that the sign up process has begun! Yes we completely understand that you are probably coming off of some awesome celebrations and are tired, but remember that this signup will be open until September 9th!  I know that I love beauty products and the idea of sharing them with others makes me oh so happy! Each round everyone seems to be loving their new friends and also loved what they received! 

Make sure that you read through the rules and full understand them. Feel free to ask any questions that you may have as well! If you are curious to see what others received last round check out this post!

Do you love getting beauty boxes?  Or maybe just trying new beauty products in general?

What about making new friends or receiving packages in the mail full of goodies? 

Want to meet another Beauty Loving Blogger? 

If any of these things sounds awesome to you, then the Pretty Little Beauty Swap is for you!

Grab button for PLBS

Hosted by Justine from Sleepy Single Girl , and Chelsee from Southern Beauty Guide The Pretty Little Beauty Swap is a bi-monthly swap between ladies who love makeup and meeting new friends!

Every other month, ladies will be paired up with another woman that they will have a chance to get to know and then get to send each other a gift of beauty products.

Swap boxes can be filled with beauty samples from past boxes that just weren’t your thing or purchased items you just know your partner will love!

Signups for this swap will be September 1st -9th. Partners will be announced by September 12th. You will have a month to get to know your partner and then packages must be sent by October 17th.

At the end of the month we will all link up to share what we’ve received!! Who’s in for some new pretty little beauty products and some even better new friends?

*All of the rules listed below are mandatory. If you can’t complete them, you won’t be able to participate in future swaps.*

1) We would love for you to follow the hosts: Southern Beauty Guide  & Sleepy Single Girl 
2) Email your partner within 72 hours of receiving your match. If you haven’t heard from your partner after 3 days are up, please let us know and we will pair you up with someone else!
3) Spend the month getting to know your partner. Learn her makeup likes and dislikes and colors she tends to use or steer clear of.
4) Each box should be a minimum of $15. I am sure your partner will love you for it. If you’d like to spend more, great! Just make sure that you talk with your partner about budgets to makes sure that you both receive an even swap. 
5) Please include at least 2 full size items that are not from a subscription service. No one wants to receive a bunch of itty bitty lotion samples!
6) Items must be new, unless you’ve discussed with your partner beforehand and she is comfortable accepting gently used items that you have tried and didn’t like.
7) Ship your packages by October 17th. Make sure to get a tracking number so we can confirm you sent a package if it gets lost.
8) Once you receive your package, create a reveal post and link up with us on October 24th.

The most important rule of them all…..Have fun!


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